The 12 Stepping Stones

Sometimes actions speak louder than words, but there are times when words are important too. In a relationship, each partner wants and needs verbal assurance of their partner’s love. Saying I love you and expressing how much important your partner is to you is one of the best ways to assure your partner. So, on Valentine’s Day, lovers should not miss an great opportunity to say something nice to a person he or she loves.

You might have heard these worn out phrases:

• You are the love of my life
• You are my only true love
• I cannot live without you

But why not try some new and different. For instance, 1 Corinthians tells us that “love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not envy, it is not proud…”

If you want literary pieces, there is this quotable Shakespeare. Listed below are lines from varying literary pieces of Shakespeare:

• Love is not love that alters when alteration finds

• Love looks not with the eyes but with the mind; and therefore is winged Cupid painted blind

• All days are nights to see till I see thee, And nights bright days when dreams do show thee to me

You may prefer philosopher giants like Socrates, Aristotle and Thoreau. They too are often quoted when they describe the feeling of love.

• The hottest love has the coldest end –Socrates

• Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies –Aristotle

• There is no remedy to love but to love more –Thoreau

Religious icons such as St. Augustine and Mother Teresa have a lot to say about love.

• Better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all –St. Augustine

• If you judge people, you have no time to love them –Mother Teresa

Love quotes can also be culled from novels, plays and poems like the one from Les Miserables: To love another person is to see the face of God.

Charles Dickens in one of his novels wrote, “Never close your lips to those whom you have opened your heart.” Meanwhile, Charlie Brown wrote, “Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love.” Here are some well-known quotes from writers:

• Love is the true means by which the world is enjoyed: our love to others, and others’ love to us.” –Thomas Trahern.

• True love never dies for it is lust that fades away. Love bonds for a lifetime but lust just pushes away.” – Alicia Barnhart

• “The Eskimos have 52 words for snow because it is so special to them; there ought to be as many for love!” – Margaret Atwood

• Love reckons hours for months, and days for years; and every little absence is an age.” –John Dryden.

Indeed, these quotes are beautiful to hear on Valentine’s Day. However, lovers should not forget that you could never go wrong with real words coming from the heart.

Are YOU Ready For Love

Are You:

* Single and Looking For Love
* Married and Trying to Improve Your Relationship

Do You:

* Want to Love Yourself More
* Find More Love in a Current Relationship
* Want a Better and More Loving Relationship the Next Time Around
* Want to Increase Your Self Esteem and Self Respect

I’m a Love and Relationship Coach and I have a program to help YOU with all these things.

Enter your name and email address below to get your FREE copy of my ebook

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(and there is a very special offer on the last page)

Let’s Start Getting YOU Ready For a More Loving Relationship TODAY

To realize
The value of a sister/brother
Ask someone
Who doesn’t have one.

To realize
The value of ten years:
Ask a newly
Divorced couple.

To realize
The value of  four years:
Ask a graduate.

To realize
The value of one year:
Ask a student who
Has failed a final exam.

To realize
The value of nine months:
Ask a mother who gave birth to a stillborn.

To realize
The value of one month:
Ask a mother who has given birth to a premature  baby..

To realize
The value of one week:
Ask an editor of a weekly newspaper.

To realize
The value of one minute:
Ask a person
Who has missed the train, bus or plane.

To realize
The value of one-second:
Ask a person who has survived an accident.

Time waits for no one.
Treasure every moment you have.

You will treasure it even more when
You can share it with someone special.

To realize the value of a friend or family member:
LOSE ONE.

The origin of this letter is unknown,
But it brings good luck to everyone who passes it on.

Remember….

Hold on tight to the ones you  love!

Considering that humans are a non-monogamous species, modern Western society’s expectations regarding relationship fidelity can be especially hard for men.   They are biologically wired to respond to variety and to sow their seed in as many places as possible, and by places I mean between women’s legs?

When Romeo and Juliet conveyed their dying love for each other (literally), most people didn’t live beyond middle age. Now with the advent of modern medicine and sanitation, our lifespan has been extended, making it less and less likely for long-term couples to remain monogamous; men’s need for sexual variety is so understood that a huge porn industry has emerged.  And when porn isn’t enough, well then there’s cheating.

TOP 10 SIGNS YOUR MAN IS CHEATING

Tell-tale signs your man is cheating include:

He starts spending less time with you, but always comes up with last minute excuses that he has to work late or take sudden trips out of town.

1. He starts spending less time with you, but always comes up with last minute excuses that he has to work late or take sudden trips out of town.
2. He no longer gives you long juicy kisses, but replaces them with short pecks on your lips or face.
3. He starts requesting that you change things about your body such as shaving your pubes.
4. He  makes  noticeable  changes  to  his  physical  appearance  such  as  adding highlights to his hair or going on a diet and working out regularly.
5. Inside his car is unfamiliar with a new radio station and the passenger seat has been changed, so you know someone else has been sitting in your seat.
6. His aroma is different because he is now wearing a new cologne or you can smell another woman’s perfume that has rubbed off on him.
7. He is constantly on his cell phone texting, talking in code or he leaves the room whenever it rings.
8. He spends more time with his computer than he does with you, especially at night when you go to bed.
9. He says that he doesn’t have enough money to buy you the things that you need because he is short of cash.
10. He suddenly starts bringing you little trinkets and acts uncharacteristically nice to you without any explanation.

This is an excerpt from The Loveologist Guide to Understanding Cheating by Dr Ava Cadell. If you want to learn why people cheat, how to know if your partner is cheating or if you want a plethora of ways to improve your relationship, get this ebook – http://understandingcheating.com

If you are concerned about your relationship and would like to speak with a love and relationship coach or a master sexpert – feel free to contact me at lovecoachjourney@gmail.com.

I want to feature some erotic reading material. This book is mainstream, but I think it will also appeal to a couple of distinct audiences. One – people who enjoy a healthy dose of sex in their books. Two – women in their 40s and 50s who understand the many layers in their lives, loves and relationships. Life gets complicated and all of our actions have many collateral implications. Author, Phyllis Schieber, is a master at combining all these things and I think you will enjoy this story. One of the characters is even an erotic author– I think you will enjoy the writing process through her eyes. This is my review – don’t you LUV that cover?

Sinners Guide to Confession

Take three best friends, each woman has her own life and family. They share just about everything – but each friend has a secret that she won’t share with her friends or family. Will people think less of her if they know the secret she is hiding? How will her life change if she admits the truth? Will her life be better if she shares the secret? Admitting the truth gives friends and family the chance to help her with the secret – is that what she wants?

Barbara, Kaye and Ellen live in New York and they are each around 50 years old. Barbara recently lost her husband when he died unexpectedly. Thankfully, she has a lucrative career as a romance author and an even more lucrative secret. Her children are grown and on their own, but she is their mother and children have certain expectations about what their mother’s should do.

Kaye has a life with her husband and her children are adults, but her relationship with her husband has grown stale – is her future with him or another man? She meets a man who makes her feel sexy and desired, that makes her “stale” relationship with her husband even harder to tolerate. What will the future bring for Kaye and her family?

Ellen was forced, by her parents, to give up her daughter for adoption. This made her relationship even more strained with her parents and siblings. This forced adoption is even harder to handle as Ellen is married and she is unable to become pregnant. Will Ellen be able to meet her long lost daughter and if she does, can they forge a relationship?

Each of these women has a strong support system in place, but she needs to make the decision to trust these people with the secrets she is hiding. Their journey to self discovery takes you on an interesting, touching, emotion and at times a humorous trek through the pages of The Sinners’ Guide to Confession. Female relationship stories are not usually my favorite reads, but I thoroughly enjoyed this book and often found myself laughing at great one liners and other times reaching for tissues as I read this very well written book by Phyllis Schieber.

To find out more about Sinners Guide to Confession — http://www.amazon.com/Sinners-Guide-Confession-Phyllis-Schieber/dp/0425221539

“Last night was intense. I cannot believe we even did that! I cannot wait to be alone again. It’s like a whole new level of the game just opened up for me. Just thinking about last night leaves me hot and unable to focus on anything.” Does this sound familiar? It probably doesn’t, unless you are in a brand new relationship.

New relationships always start out pretty steamy. There’s always excitement surrounding doing anything sexual with a new partner. It’s invigorating to say the least! Wouldn’t it be nice to keep that level of excitement even after years of being with your partner? Try spicing up your sex life with a little experimentation.

Be sure to talk openly about experimentation. It’s important to know and respect each other’s boundaries. Once you are both comfortable with each other enough to talk about the things you would like to try, it will make the experimenting loads of dirty fun!

Below is a short list of fun ways to add a zing of excitement to your sex life.

1. Try a little light bondage.

Use whatever your saucy little heart desires as bonding material. Try starting with an easy place, like your bed, and work up to the more exciting places, like your back porch railing or the stair case or even the tree outside!

2. Add Toys.

Take your partner to an adult toy shop (or shop online if you’re the shy type) and each pick out a toy that you would like your partner to use on you. Once you get home, let the fun begin. Make sure to let down your guards and guide your partner through what you want.

3. Make your fantasy come true.

Think of the sexiest place you would like to get frisky in, then go there. You and your partner should both take turns picking places. Don’t leave out any details. Make sure to make your real-life fantasy as true to your imagined one as possible. Dress the part!

4. Use your senses.

When one of our senses is taken away, our other senses are sharpened to make up for the lost. Try blindfolding your partner. They won’t know what to expect next. Every intimate touch will be heightened to its fullest. Use tingling lube or ice cubes to really drive their senses wild.

5. Videotape yourselves.

Try setting up a video camera and act out your scenes. Make sure to watch it after you’re through. Being caught in the act and liking it can be quite fun. Being able to laugh at yourselves sexually will lighten the mood and make it even easier to speak to your partner about sexy time.

Stacey Cavalari holds a B.A in Communications and currently writes for Viamedic.com , a safe pharmacy for consumers to obtain FDA-approved medications such as Viagra, Cialis and Levitra Online. Stacey uses her communications and research skills to cover health and wellness on the Viamedic.com Blog.

Have you noticed there are a decent number of people on the internet who are looking for someone to chat with online, on the phone or on webcams. There are also plenty of people who engage in various forms of phone and cyber-sex. But its not just a playful way to flirt with a stranger, there can be great benefits from phone sex for people in a long term relationship.

Define Phone Sex – Personal and Business

“Phone sex is a type of virtual sex that refers to sexually explicit conversation between two or more persons via telephone, especially when at least one of the participants masturbates or engages in sexual fantasy. Phone sex conversation may take many forms, including (but not limited to): guided, sexual sounds, narrated, and enacted suggestions; sexual anecdotes and confessions; candid expression of sexual feelings or love; discussion of very personal and sensitive sexual topics; or just two people listening to each other masturbate.

Phone sex exists both in the context of intimate relationships (e.g., among distanced lovers), and as a commercial transaction between a paying customer and a paid professional.” (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phone_sex)

Phone sex does not involve physical contact between the participants. You may wonder what sort of people participate in cyber-sex and phone sex?

• Single men and women
• Married men and women
• People who want to reach out to another person – even anonymously
• People in long distance relationship
• People who are separated by travel

People in a relationship may choose to engage in phone sex when they are separated by long distance and physical intimacy isn’t possible. There are also single or married people who want a connection to someone else. Some of these people would masturbate alone, but may choose to masturbate with another person – separated by the phone or internet. The people involved in the call do not have physical contact with one another, they may:

• use webcams to watch each other – clothed or nude
• one or both participants may masturbate during the call or chat
• one or both participants may talk about things they would like to do together
• one or both participants may talk about what they are doing to themselves while they are on the call or chat
• the conversation or chat can often lead to orgasm for one or both participants

These are some of the more common possibilities – what options would you add to the list?

I highly recommend this for couples who are away from each other, but want to maintain intimacy while you’re apart. You may think this wouldn’t be enjoyable or this wouldn’t make you horny. Here is a scenario – it has been a long day at work and you want to spend some time together, but can’t because he’s out of town. So, you decide to give him a call. During this call, the conversation could turn to the things you enjoy doing together. I admit that it can be boring depending on what you say.

On the other hand, let’s try something more creative and set the mood. You and your partner are each in a private space, maybe sitting on a comfortable chair or on your bed. As you begin to talk, the conversation gets hotter as you share some of the sexy things you enjoy. While he’s talking, you begin to unbutton your shirt and maybe slip off your shorts. Leaning back, you begin to run your hands over your body, with your eyes closed and thinking about him doing those things to you. This scenario can be very hot and enjoyable for both of you. Imagine you are massaging your clitoris and playing with your vibrator and/or dildo. You’re getting hotter while you watch him stroke his penis and you tell him how you want to take him in your hand and wrap your lips around him. As you explain in a sexy voice how you want to massage his balls while you take him into your hot, wet mouth and then you hear him moan. So, are you horny yet….

Most people know that men are visual beings. Their partner’s appearance is important, but that is NOT the full story. In addition, looks can fade and you need more than a cute face and body to get through the tough times.

But what are some other things that will capture his eye and keep his attention. There is a master list or checklist below to share many of these qualities with you. I also posted a question on my Facebook wall to see what my friends had to share and their comments are woven into the list.

• A woman with a strong sense of self-worth and who loves herself
• An adventuresome women – show your man that you are up for some adventure, indoors and out
• A woman who loves her partner as he is, without an agenda or plan to change him
• Affectionate women – take the time to be affectionate with you man, this can be innocent touching, loving, sensual and erotic affectionate gestures.
• A woman who appreciates a “nice guy” who will treat her well and love her
• Women who communicate openly, honestly & in a positive way
• Women who take the initiative – in life and especially sexually
• Uninhibited women who are comfortable in her skin and willing to go after what she wants
• Women who wear sexy lingerie and learning to do a strip tease is good
• Women who are responsive verbally and non-verbally – let your partner know you enjoy your time together
• Women who enjoy erotic dialogue – men enjoy it when their woman is willing to “talk dirty” to him. It can take some practice, but his reaction is worth the effort.
• This can include: talk in person, sexy notes, suggestive texts and emails
• Women who show their appreciation – in bed and out. Show that you appreciate the things he does for you.
• Women with a good sense of humor – but never make it look like you’re laughing AT him
• Easy-going women – leave the drama behind. The majority of men do not want to deal with the unnecessary drama. There are much better ways to get and keep his attention. This is also a reason many younger men give for their attraction to “older” women – much less drama.

How many of these traits do you have? If your answer is yes to only a few, it would be beneficial to work on developing more. These are some of the things that go into the “art of making love”. A few of the ways include: learning to release your inner sexpot, remembering to be a sensual wife along with being a mom, and learning to enjoy your sexuality along with pleasing your partner.

If you would like to learn more about developing these qualities and learning to please yourself and your partner, contact lovecoachjourney@gmail.com for more information. You can also download this FREE ebook Make it Happen! Discover More and Passion.

How have your sexual preferences and behavior changed over the years. In our 20s, we are often learning about ourselves and the opposite size. So many things are new to us and we may have insecurities about our prowess, our skills, and maybe our gender preferences. There are plenty of young men and women who experiment during their college years – the new freedom from parental oversight makes college a great time to try new things and experiment.

As we move into our 30s, our sexual confidence is likely to grow and we may want to try more adventurous things. Maybe you want to try BDSM or if you prefer vanilla sex, you may want to add some light bondage or pain. Many women experience more orgasms in their 30s, this may be because of increased confidence or because we are willing to ask for what we want from our partner.

The difficulties many couples feel in their 30s are created by having young children in the house – because of interruptions and exhaustion from your children. But as the children grow older and have more independence, their parents may find they have more time for private, sexual time together in their 40s or later.

But as we age, our bodies may begin to give us unique problems. Over half of the men will have problems getting an erection – not all the time, but from time to time they may have this problem. The men and their partners need to be understanding about these common issues. The problem will be made worse if the men or their partner overreact or are extremely negative about these difficulties. There are many temporary issues that may manifest themselves through erectile dysfunction, so its good to do thorough research and see what you need to adjust in your life to alleviate this problem. But I can tell you that added stress only makes the problem worse.

By the time we reach our 40s, over half of the people have been unfaithful to a partner. Whether this makes it wrong or right is a difficult question, but it is a fact of life for many men and women. So, heading into our late thirties and early forties, we should take a look at our relationship and see if there are any warning signs of potential problems. Learn more about the issues that are likely to lead to cheating and do what you can to head them off. A great resource is the Loveologists Guide to Understand Cheating – http://www.loveologyuniversity.com/DrAvaPages/luguide-cheating.html

There could be many reasons for this – but most people are having less sex in their 40s. This could definitely lead to the temptation to cheat, so be aware of letting our sex lives slide. Decreased sexual activity could also be a reason why a third of the men in their 40s are watching porn regularly. Or, it could be because their partners are more comfortable with incorporating porn into their time together.

As we move into our 40s, many people stop using protection when they have sex – even with new partners. Maybe we have gotten into a groove with a long term partner or there could be another reason – but it is important to be safe and especially with new partners or if you are having casual sex or one night stands. You’re never too old to be safe.

Which of these things sound familiar to you? Are they issues that concern you? Its important that we don’t get into a rut with our sex lives and our partners. There can be many ways that we take our partner for granted, but you can head off many problems by maintaining a healthy sex life that is satisfying to you and your partner – for years to come.